Two of my latest obsessions are ‘Life, the universe and everything’ by Douglas Adams and ‘Weird Fishes/Arpeggios’ by Radiohead. The former is one of the books from his Hitchhiker’s Guide to Galaxy series and the latter is a song from Radiohead’s ‘In Rainbow’s’ album.
Every sentence in the book is highlightable. Adams is a fabulous writer. So witty, so deep and so out of this world. Like this one I just came across, which prompted me to write this post :
“Just as a slow series of clicks when speeded up will lose the definition of each individual click and gradually take on the quality of a sustained and rising tone, so a series of individual impressions here took on the quality of a sustained emotion – and yet not an emotion. If it was an emotion, it was a totally emotionless one. It was hatred, implacable hatred. It was cold, not like ice cold, but like a wall is cold. It was impersonal, not like a randomly flung fist in a crowd is impersonal, but like a computer-issued parking summons is impersonal. And it was deadly, again, not like a bullet or a knife is deadly, but like a brick wall across an expressway is deadly.
And just as a rising tone will change in character and take on harmonics as it rises, so again, this emotionless emotion seemed to rise to an unbearable if unheard scream and suddenly seemed to be a scream of guilt and failure.
And suddenly it stopped.”
The second obsession the weird fishes/arpeggios is equally beautifully written and composed. The lyrics, Thom Yorke’s haunting voice and the repetitive drum/guitar rhythm pattern makes this song truly intriguing.
“I’d be crazy not to follow.
Follow where you lead
They turn me
Turn me on to phantoms
I follow to the edge of the earth
And fall off
If they get the chance
And this is my chance”.
The last time I blogged, I promised that I will write more often and come up with some new projects. Life apparently had some other plans for me. So, I broke up with him after two and a half years of roller-coaster ride together. We hit the new highs and the new lows. But somethings happened and I realized that I didn’t want to continue being this way. It was very difficult last few months. Now I feel very different. The strangest thing is I am so apathetic. I am still trying to register what I learnt from this. However, it is quite difficult. I will need to contemplate what I really feel about it. But two years is a long time and we have always been such good friends. It’s gonna be difficult to adjust to things without each other. Even though I have had a lot of practice of being on my own when it comes to a lot of things for the past couple of months. I feel like it is difficult to lose the feeling of love for someone that you have loved for so long. Do you really lose it? Or does it just gets transformed into something bitter or nonchalant? I don’t really know because right now I can’t feel anything. I feel love for this guy I met quite recently but it’s on and off. I am so scared and skeptical with the idea of devoting myself fully to another human being and being vulnerable. I realize that something inside me is broken. Trust, belief, hope, I can’t really point out what it is. But when I look at my road ahead, there is no one walking with me anymore. I am all alone.
This, however, has made me very determined to take care of myself. I have been more focused on what I want from my life now. I am quite sure that the next one year of my life will not be a waste. I cannot afford to lose more time on dilly dallying about emotional shits. I want to work on my stuffs. I got into a new online course at my university. I am applying for a work visa and if it works out, I will need to find a job that I love and kill myself with it. So, you might ask me why I chose this. The easiest thing to do would be to just stay in the relationship and get used to the chaos, out of convenience. But all my life, the quest has been to avoid exactly this chaos, this mediocre mundane existential cycle, this monotonous boredom, this hatred and dislike in eyes of each other. I just don’t want to get used to that.
So, the process of living right now has been to keep my mind off the bad thoughts as much as possible. I’ve become much calmer than ever before and I know where I am heading. This feels really good. I have a good feeling about myself.
Anyways, on another note, it’s my favourite poet Charles Bukowski’s birthday today. So, here’s his poem called ‘the crunch’ narrated by the man himself. Happy Birthday badass wordsmith! 🙂
I am finally done with my studies. I delivered my thesis on music and indigenous identity and had an oral defense. And I graduated. Yes! Done with MPhil in Indigenous Studies. Yay! 😊 I will be getting back to the blog with something new soon. Stay tuned.
Here are some pictures of sunny beautiful Tromsø I took from the plane some time ago while I was flying down to Oslo.
It’s Nepali New Year today. Happy Nepali New Year. We are in 2074 now. We are way ahead in time, no? 😝
But this is not the only new year we celebrate. We have celebration on other new years like Tibetan/Sherpa, Newari, Tamang, Western as well. I feel so privileged and grateful that I grew up in such a harmonious and open minded society where we learn to be receptive, tolerant and respectful towards other cultures and ways of lives.
Here are some pictures I took from the walk this afternoon. The weather in Tromsø has been so beautiful the past few days.
Meanwhile, it’s Easter as well so, Happy Easter. God Påske as Norwegians say it!
It is so difficult for me to find inspiration, motivation and enthusiasm to write my thesis. I just feel so lame. I question my ability to present my arguments and I find it so futile this attempt to tell this story. I don’t know when I started losing my interest to write my thesis. I have less than one and a half month to finish and deliver the thesis but I find it almost impossible to sit down and work every day. I kinda miss writing Project Happiness 365. It gave me so much happiness and also provided me with feeling of accomplishment.
I was reading a book on writing for scholars and the author makes it pretty clear that writing is a rigorous process that needs time and energy. Without really putting words on paper, one can’t really know where s/he stands with his project.
The struggle is still on though. Meanwhile, there is sun in Tromsø now giving me warmth and hope to get through this test. ☀
A little hiatus for this blog as the deadline to submit my thesis is coming near.
But here are some pictures from my recent walks in the Norwegian wood. Days are getting more light. And soon summer will be here. I can’t wait. 😊
Long time no see! 😉 I have been MIA for a while. But here I am. Today I present to you my favorite green lady from Norway. The magical Northern lights. She paid me a visit last night at the cabin in Lyfjord and gave an awesome dance show. It was a bit cold to stand there, witness her performance and take pictures. But it was worth it. 😍
So, here are some pictures of aurora borealis I managed to take with my cell phone camera. This is one of the primary reasons why you should visit Northern Norway.
With love from Norway!
Last week’s rainy days had taken away most of the snow and people were complaining about global warming. But the snow and the winter vibe came back. It snowed so much the last two days that Tromsø turned into a Winter Wonderland one more time. Oh! You won’t believe how happy the skiers are!
University looked lovely with the white veil this afternoon.
I had a nice time keeping him company while he was smoking, at my favorite ‘breather’ space.
We went to Lyfjord after two months. If you have been reading my blog, then you know how much I love this place. It was a delightful break from the stressful studies and work life.
The house where we stay, stands by the sea and is further away from all the other houses in Lyfjord center. The nearest neighboring house is 5 mins walk away. There is a barn, an outside toilet, a boathouse and a storage room along with a two story main house. It’s an old Norwegian house so, there is no running water in the tap. However, the most fun part of living here is to fetch water from the nearby river.
Thankfully, there is an electric stovetop/oven and firewood oven to make food. Heating system works fine in the ground floor rooms. There is also an old TV with national channel NRK that we love to watch. I personally love listening to the old radio in the kitchen. Since there is no bathrooms in the house, we don’t shower when we are there. That’s the typical Norwegian cabin life: outside toilet and no shower. 😉
Nevertheless, I find living in Lyfjord very calming and rejuvenating. On this trip, I realized how much I actually enjoy baking. We baked ginger cookies and bollers.
And the bonus point, of course was the amazing dance by my favorite green lady. The whole sky was lighted up by powerful green aurora.
It snowed so much last night. We were gonna take the bus and it was a hell of a walk to the bus stop through the snow. We are now back to our student housing but I am already missing Lyfjord and the stress free life there.
Last week we were lucky to have beautiful sunny days. It gave me lots of energy to wake up early and go out for a lunch at my new hangout ‘Dragøy’ in Kysten Hus. The place has amazing view and you also have a chance to meet and talk to some interesting people.
I also went for a walk around the city and took some pictures. Just have a look!
If you have not visited this amazing Norwegian city also known as the Paris of the North, then you should. Plan your trip, trust me you won’t be disappointed. 😊