Project Happiness 365: Day 219

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My friend shared this insightful post about the happiness in modern world.

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I am relatively a pessimistic person. It’s not that I have been like this always. I remember I used to be a happy content kid. But over the time, I went through quite a lot of shits that have left me scarred. Despite this, I started this series on my blog so that I can acknowledge the reason to be happy each day in this otherwise bleak and sad world.

Everyday so much depressing news are coming from around the world. It’s like the world is going through a painfully difficult PMS. On the personal front, each day I face so many challenging emotions from within myself and others that I find difficult to cope with. Feels like, I am on a never-ending PMS as well. Last night, I almost made a decision to stop posting these ‘happy’ posts. I was in the depth of despair. I had never felt this disconnected with him and my surrounding in my entire life and it saddens me. It is not his fault because what I am feeling is entirely because of myself. So, before making last night’s post I was thinking aloud: “Am I genuinely happy? Who am I kidding? Why am I pretending everything is okay when it’s not? Why am I pretending to be happy when I am not?” But he assured me that I was doing a great job by posting this and talked about the growth in me.

I slept to the idea and woke up to believe that there is a purpose in me doing this. I hope my posts make someone genuinely happy. It’s not a lie when I post a picture of sun and say that ‘this sun made me happy today’. Still past few days have been very melancholy. I guess that is what brings change. It’s not always easy but when things are not working, it is a sign that you need to make a change within yourself. Everything else will work itself around it.

Hope, hope, hope! why are you so painfully intriguing? Why? Why? Why?

 

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