I learnt great lessons through my experience of being with him.
- Love is important. There will be ups and downs, highs and lows, good and bad times. There will be times when you will feel like you are tripping without taking any drugs. And there will be times when you feel so shitty that your whole existence stinks. But one thing you should always keep in mind is you love this person. No matter how intense the argument is, you should always remember that the person is not your enemy. S/he is not in an opposition party. You two are on the same boat. The argument becomes pointless after sometimes anyways.
- Never dwell on past. Past is important of course, but never ever spend time discussing who you dated, how long, why, when and where. Spare the details. Yes, you must be true to each other but discussing and dwelling on past is pretty pointless. It sometimes leads to unwanted arguments and negative feelings. So, you had a past. Good for you! Who doesn’t? But that doesn’t mean that you are allowed to judge the other person based on the choices s/he made, say 5 years ago. (Unless s/he is a serial killer clown in the closet! :P) Things change, people change. You are his/her choice too. Remember! Never dwell on past. Period
- Anger is toxic. I have learnt this a very hard way. I had a severe anger issue. I was actually violent. I had to go through a lot of psychotherapy sessions to be able to deal with it. It came back again and again. I hurt him very much with my stupid aggressive behaviour. But after almost losing him, I realized my mistake. I have tried very hard not to let anger cloud my judgement. It’s very difficult. I still snap sometimes but I’m not physically violent. I also try to avoid arguments as much as possible. That doesn’t mean I am brooding on the inside. I am trying to let it out in different ways. I meditate, I have self healing sessions, I color Mandalas, I read, I listen to music and I think about all the positive things I share with him. It helps. It’s tough but it helps.
- Don’t talk about your relationship with other people. Your relationship is non of other people’s concern. It’s so funny how we share the details about our relationship online and with our friends. It’s stupid you know. I used to talk about my relationship with my bestie but I realized that I was just boring them. It’s pointless too. If I don’t understand my relationship myself, how can I expect someone else to understand it. If you have any problems with your better half, talk, communicate and solve it together. Talking about your relationship with others only encourages gossip and aggravates the problem. Spare yourself and others from that crap and stop your relationship problems from being turned into mountain out of molehill.
- Practice gratitude. Isn’t it amazing that you have found this other person you can share your story with? How lovely it is that there is another soul who is brave enough to be with you and go through all the ups and downs! Be thankful for the companionship, trust and love. Be grateful that you have someone you can come home to, smile with, make experiences with and travel together in this journey called Life.
Day 31: Jasmine Tea
Whoa! This post is becoming pretty long. All thanks to this amazing Jasmine tea I got from my favourite tea shop in Kathmandu. It’s been ages since I drank that tea.
Today I am all alone. I lit some candles, played some good music, made some Jasmine tea and here I am posting this hopefully insightful post. 🙂
There’s an amazing tea shop near Patan Durbar Square in Nepal called ‘Swotha Kisosk‘. I loved that place. It is a small cozy tea shop with varieties of teas. My favourite one was Jasmine tea. They served you tea with real jasmine flowers in it. Jasmine tea is a great antioxidant and its best benefit is that it reduces stress. Every time I needed to let myself lose, I went there, ordered a cup of great jasmine infusion, sat outside in the porch drinking and watching the humdrum of life in ancient surrounding of Patan. The picture above is from one of my amazing ‘me’ time there few years ago.